"If you've ever been the most popular girl at high school, nothing can scare you anymore".
I still remember how June said that to me. She was the one who taught me how to be a mean girl.
Mila was sitting on her desk, looking at the book on her lap. Her feet didn't touch the ground as she noticed he was walking up to her. She clenched her fists. The class was full of sound. People were in groups, chatting, laughing, except for her who was sitting alone, and she desparately wanted to be in one of those groups now.
The guy had the confidence of a movie star. "Fuck, how does he pull that off?" she thought. Was it the richness? Was it the privilage? Was it just his brains? "He shouldn't see my fists clenched like that", she thought. She painfully relaxed her hands even if she didn't want to at all. She was trying to control her breath.
The headstock of a guitar poked her white shirt's arm, just at the place the arm gets connected to the front of the shirt. Silence. Mila pretended to read on, which she wasn't at the first place. What a futile attempt.
- Hey, he said, after taking his time. "Is it true that you've registered for the music club?"
Mila's head was still down as she blushed, feeling like a small animal trapped in a cage. Why was he asking her that? To make fun? To take advantage somehow? She looked down. He was so close, blocking her way to get down from the desk. "He always does that, traps me." she thought. "He's doing that on purpose." If Mila wasn't so tame, she could've named the feeling she had as being so pissed. She forced herself to face him realizing fully she didn't have a chance to escape the situation anymore.
- Hey, how are you doing? She heard her voice as if from a mile away.
- Is it true that you're attending the music club? Matt's voice was dull, on the verge of being harsh, as he repeated the sudden question.
- Yeah, said Mila, trying to act normal. "What now?" she thought.
- I'm also there, he said, staring directly into her eyes, with a serious look on his face.
She got what he said. What she didn't get was what he was trying to say: "Don't go there"? "Good that you attend, too."? "I hate you."? "I like you."? "Let's fuck"? "Get lost?" Mila had no idea what he was trying to achieve but it was not a good sign he was talking to her.
-So? she asked.
- So... he said, waiting for her to understand what he meant. She didn't. Because Mila didn't know anything about the rumours. She stared, her mouth half open, as the guitar's tuners stroked her arm.
- Bitches like rumours and rumours like the popular. Going to class and finding out "you slept with someone else's boyfriend last night" is everyday stuff if you're popular and surrounded by bitches. -June
June was watching the vid of the newest Lindsay Lohan hit on her phone. She was sitting in the corner of the class, surrounded by a few other girls. Pop songs on MTV: One of the reasons why her boyfriend thought she had awful music taste. She did, but she liked her awful taste.
"Why can't you just let me do
The things I wanna do
I just wanna be me
I don't understand why"
A bunch of tiny girls danced to the beat on the screen:
"Would you wanna bring me down
I'm only having fun
I'm gonna live my life
(but not the way you want me to)
I'm tired of rumours starting..."
"Rumours" was the title of the song. It was about how the pop starlet was sick of the stories media made up about her. "That bitch is trying to glorify herself" June thought. "The song is all about "I'm the shit, everyone is watching me, etc, etc. Who cares about her?" Still, she couldn't avoid feeling close to the song. She had rumours starting about her basicly all her life long. "June slept with the teacher" "June wears a push-up bra, her boobs are actually tiny" "Your boyfriend fucked June, people saw them going to his house together." "Do you know what June said about you?"
June was hated by girls and guys even more than she was liked, basicly because almost every guy at school liked her. Girls hated her for one main reason, jealousy, and the guys who hated her did it usually because of being rejected by her. June's head was gonna explode from the earphones connected to her phone and from thinking "How can I get away from all that?!" Her life had a trap. That's when she saw Matt walking up to Mila. Her pupils got bigger as she watched Mila squirm on the desk she was sitting. She saw Matt's guitar rest against Mila's arm as Mila coldly sweated. June was two things: Most popular girl at the school, and, at heart, a saviour. She stared at Matt with a mixture of hate and interest, and then to Mila, with a mixture of empathy and interest. She would soon change Mila's life forever and turn Matt's upside down. June was at her best when she was interested. And she made very sudden decisions about big things.